Last week I started my weekly countdown to Christmas! 🎅🏻 Only 6 more Mondays! If you are still thinking through gift ideas, I shared my personal wishlist last week HERE. Moms, sisters, aunts, daughters, friends… any girl in your life would appreciate those gifts, so go check them out! 😉 Fair warning- you may want to keep these things for yourself!
On this Monday morning as I’m sipping my coffee and sporadically decking my halls 🎄 I am compelled to share with you from my heart…
Sometimes the signs of the universe lead you to your next move, without question. And sometimes you find yourself just wishing with all your might to know what to do next. These feelings can come forward in many different situations, and for me I am feeling the pull of the universe in many areas of my life simultaneously. But, it is matched with those wishes of knowing what to do next. I am stuck in this ‘in between’ where I feel as though the signs are right in front of me… yet I still need that reassurance to move forward.
I am sharing this because the ever present note that I am recognizing through all of this… is self-doubt. And it is showing up in 2 ways.
First– As a Mom and Wife, it is hard to prioritize other things. Things that bring me personal joy, for ME alone. And when I find myself prioritizing those things, I have that feeling of self doubt that I am not the Mother I promised to be, or the Wife that I vowed to be. It makes me question if I am doing the right thing by focusing time outside of my family.
Second– Doing the things I have come to love, like decorating, blogging, inspiring others through sharing… I can’t help but doubt… Am I good at this? Do people enjoy following along my journey? Does anyone even care? These questions bring me back to my first point of doubt… why am I sacrificing time with my family for things that may not make a difference?
These are raw, real feelings friends. And I know I am not the only one who feels this way. Which I why I felt compelled to share. It is a hard truth, but no one is going to set the path for you. You may feel guided by the universe, or by God, but you are not going to receive a phone call or letter in the mail detailing what your next move should be. Life is about taking risks, and doing what you LOVE. I love to be my husband’s Wife, and I love to be my boys’ Mom. But I also LOVE to do other things. When you feel a nudge, it is up to you to step forward. You may have people in your life who support you in your endeavors, but they are not going to decide for you whether or not to do something. You have to decide for yourself, and do it for YOU.
When my feelings of doubt come forward, I allow myself to feel them. Think through them. Try to identify why I am feeling that way and where it is coming from.
‘Maybe I should try harder this week to spend a little more one on one time with my people…’
‘Maybe I should ask for feedback on my last design project…’
This helps me to pinpoint my doubt, stare it in the face, and get to the root cause of it and ELIMINATE it. Dreams are not going to be achieved when we are beating ourselves up or doubting what we are capable of. Dreams are met when we believe in ourselves and have the courage to stand up when negative thoughts come in.
If you have had any of these feelings, in any regard, I hope that my ramblings today have inspired you. Sometimes we just need those reminders that we are amazing beings, and we are worthy. Go out there and live your dream Mama, whatever that means to you ❤️